NB: This book is a satire.

Prof. Oisín MacAmadaín is an expert—one of the best in fact. Founder, sole lecturer, and provost of The Termonfeckin Institute of Expertise in Ireland’s beautiful Co. Louth, he knew that if there was one thing governments needed for their response to Covid, it was his enormous brain. Consequently, he has devoted every waking moment of the Covid era to advising all government cabinets everywhere on the supreme value of masks, lockdowns, mandates, and being vaccinated at least once a month.

He was at a certain point, however, utterly horrified to learn of the existence of certain total thickos, tinfoil hat wearers, and those who were generally of a conspiratorial disposition. Sensing that the mentally soft among us could be prone to believing any old kind of nonsense, he set out to write a book to counteract the nefarious mis-, dis-, and downright crackpot information that is currently being spread among the nether regions of the internet.

Do you have a neighbor or, heaven forbid, friend or family member, who regularly spews utter nonsense in your direction along the lines of their government being out to chip them or that a quack aromatherapy pill like vitamin D might save lives from Covid? Or perhaps you have been accosted by a random conspiracy theorist in the street who adamantly believes that everyone should add horse-dewormer to their morning coffee or that lockdowns aren’t the pinnacle of scientific acumen that they clearly are and that whoever invented them should obviously win a Nobel Prize?

This, at last, is the audiobook you need in order to arm yourself with bulletproof arguments and put these poor deluded souls in their proper place once and for all!

In it, you will learn:

• How to counteract the views of fringe far-right scientists who say that lockdowns mightn’t be the best idea
• Why society under lockdown has arguably never been better for our general happiness levels or mental well-being
• How to fact-check like a pro
• Why masks make you really sexy (but why wearing masks in combination with pantyhose will not only make you even sexier but will protect you amazingly against Covid)
• The countries that did it best: Australia, Canada, Austria, and, of course, the dear old Emerald Isle! (Don’t we just punch above our weight in everything?)
• And the places that did it worst: Belarus, Mexico, Romania, Florida, and Sweden.... Oh, Sweden! How is it that a formerly liberal utopia became such a far-right nightmare?
• The nefarious dealings of prominent antivaxxers and the generally awful consequences of their actions (such as creating vaccine hesitancy disease, an illness almost on a par with Covid itself)
• Why the vaccine is definitely a vaccine (because it self-identifies as one and it is vaccinephobic to suggest otherwise)
• Why The Great Reset is absolutely 100 percent what we need and will make us all utterly delirious with joy by 2030

So, sit back, enjoy, take it all in, and remember: Get your boosters, keep your distance and, for the love of god, stay extremely safe!